Not So Funny

She wasn’t funny. 

This is my opinion, and just like everyone else, we all have one.  Mine comes from an objective place; last week, I had no idea who Michelle Wolf was, nor do I support or have any life-altering disgust for the people whom she roasted. 

But… she wasn’t funny.

Now, you may be of the majority who disagrees with me, and that’s fine.  I bear no ill will against disagreements.  What I’m seeing is that the people who are throwing accolades at Wolf’s feet are the ones who are already so vocal against our simp of a President and his general political party.  Frankly, I found that she was no different than those she spoke against.  Sure, there was a Hillary joke tossed in to “balance” things out, but the slant was definitely at a hard right. 

Let’s break this down though - she came out explaining and almost even apologizing for what she was about to unleash, so she lost me right at the beginning.  “She was brave!”  Bravery is owning without justification.  With the exception of “you should have done your research,” the jokes weren’t anything I don’t read in my newsfeed every day – which is chock full of comedians so I was surprised to see a few of them label her as “original.”  The jokes were hack, and she came across as someone who was paid to read them aloud with no style whatsoever.  It’s not a plus that her biggest ally is the beyond-brash perpetual victim Kathy Griffin.  And I get that it is tradition to ‘roast’ the political climate, but I much prefer a smarter type of comedy.  It’s not a lowbrow audience or event, and my entire life I’ve been taught ‘know your time and place.’  Just because the other team sink beneath dignity doesn’t mean that we have to.

Now on the flip side, those claiming to be offended are likely putting on a good show because they walk on hot coals as it is; you don’t do that without some expectation of being burned.  And the fire wasn’t even that intense.  Mr. Rickles is probably groaning in his grave.  Making fun of someone’s eye shadow is not exactly an offense to start wars over.  If anyone’s ego is that sensitive, they should not be a public face in politics or any other arena. 

Really and simplistically, this entire dust up is just another opportunity to spread more hatred.  Not the comedian – don’t get me wrong.  She was paid to do a job, she did said job and it is well within tradition.  I am referring to us as a public.  We seize on every single moment of every single day to insult somebody about their choice in politics.  It is disappointing, because we should be better.  We used to be better.  I am so tired of the outright anger or the passive-aggressive attitudes that surround me.  “I encourage healthy discussion, BUT…!” and off they go.

As I understand, this used to be a decent and even anticipated tradition where everyone took a little heat, gave what they got and had a little chuckle at themselves as a whole.  So, is it time to retire it?  Could 45 actually be on to something?  Sure, it’s hypocritical to be the most insulting person on the planet and calling for peace, but maybe we need to look a little more at our own roles.

See, folks, this is why we can’t have nice things.  Because everything has to be so extreme.  Maybe when we get back to a middle ground we can inject funny again – but please, find a better comic to get us there.    

Two Ears and Ten Fingers

There's an old guy sitting next to me, and he couldn't be more clichéd. I say that not as a judgment but an observation. There began a conversation between me, him and another  older lady about movies, and it morphed into his declaring he stopped going to #movies because "I go to be entertained, not to see political messages. I saw three movies in a row, and walked out on all of them. What was that one? Michael Moore? I just don't want to see it," to which my thought was then why did you pay to go see it? 

Further in, I'm likening it to the climate today of how we often go looking for a fight when it could actually be avoided. I did that myself just this morning as someone 'challenged' me on the road. 

I abandoned the conversation early on because I was watching the Vice News piece on the Charlottesville rally and it just got to the part where the car plowed into the crowd. I wasn't expecting to see that and it was shocking. I actually had to work at not crying in public.

I would pause now and then to hear what was being said next to me because the old guy was pounding the bar every so often so it was clear he was on a tear about something. He went through the usual tirades in systematic order; politics (the white people are not wrong), young people ("if I hear one more young person say 'I don't feel any passion for my job'..." and how technology has killed society), he gets harassed everywhere he goes (the bus, Safeway, TSA).

In the middle of all of this, this newer guy who has been working here comes over to introduce himself. "You're a part of my corner, every time I come around this side so I couldn't not say hello!" Turns out that for the past 20 years, he's been working at training rescue dogs for behavioral problems, saving them from being euthanized at the shelters. He came back to working as a server because he needs money to continue doing this work. I mentioned that I have friends who foster and train animals and remarked on what a good thing he's doing.

Then I come back to hearing Old Guy still going on., and she's looking a little like 'how did I get into this?' Now I'm thinking of how we have become such a society of extremism - either we're too encouraging of the younger generation by means of blind optimism or we tear them down by dismissing the things they stand for and dream of. Perhaps we've always been that way but I really believe it's stronger now. I could certainly hear it in the disdain of every one of Old Guy's words. The one thing I agreed with was how Twitter got saved in the nick of time by the madness of one man, because who doesn't like to watch a shit-show unfold in real time?

Then he stood to go, and says to the lady next to him "Thanks, this was really fun, getting to talk to you. I don't get to visit with people very often." and that was the most revealing thing he'd said all afternoon.

More than anything, isolation is what's brought us to this place. People feel so alone - detached or that they can't be their authentic selves. When they see an opening to engage, it becomes extreme in some way or another. We try to reach out to our own kind - those who validate some of what we feel, be it good, evil or nothing more than in between.

At the end of that documentary, I watched the main guy sit calmly and justify why Heather Heyer was killed. The woman interviewing him in the entire broadcast remained stoic at each thing he said. It's not something we see too often anymore; neutrality. It isn't that we shouldn't feel, it's that we should *think.* And ask questions. 

My question is ... would there be such global outrage if the person killed had been on the other side of the protest?

Most importantly, we need to listen when those questions are answered, whether it's what we want to hear or not.

The Sword of Freedom

I think we should accept that "Knee-Jerk" has become the new religion of Americans and be done with it.  Let's just own who we are and move on.

We've become this cesspool of reaction without any critical thinking and the result is chaos.  As long as we have determined what is "right," everything else is wrong. 

Now, let's take a look at the mess over in Charlottesville.  For the record; I am not in support of any message that came from that protest.  I think it's horrible that we are still dealing with such a divide of race after all this time.  What happens in Virginia most certainly does not stay in Virginia, however, as one man found out.  Cole White, who works for a populary eatery in Berkeley, was spotted at the alt-right rally and targeted by social media until Top Dog decided to cave and they fired him. 

Had they fired him because he'd called in sick to attend the rally, or had he been wearing a shirt with their logo or represented them in some other way, or even that they'd waited a minute to see that sales had declined or that they simply didn't like the way his hair was combed that day, it's California so by all means - fire him.  That's all allowable by law. 

However... what isn't legal in California is to fire someone based upon their political beliefs.  If White (ironic much?) wants to be a racist on his own time and outside of the uniform, he's allowed to be just that.  Unless there was a contract that in some way stipulates that this is against company policy, they are not necessarily in the right.

When I tried to point this out in my online commentary, I was immediately cyber-attacked by way of insults of all sorts, and woke to a shitstorm of rage that had gone on all night.  When they began to remark on my selfies, I knew I'd pissed some people off.  Rather than continue the battle, I just laughed at the comedic tragedy unfolding on the internet.  One guy said "Why are you defending this creep?  It's really pathetic of you."  to which I replied "No, what's pathetic is that that's the message you all took away from this."

And when we are right, everyone else is wrong.  There is very little room for grey in the red, white and blue. 

I made this analogy that only fanned the flames as being "incredibly superficial" and "idiotic":  'What if you went to a concert and your employer felt that the artist clashed with their values, so they fired you?  Would that be fair?'  No, but in California, it'd be legal.  It may seem a silly comparison but an accurate one.  Too many don't realize that the sword of freedom swings both ways.  When we want it to cut one person from where we want them to be, it can swing back even mightier and remove you from where you want to be. 

Rights are rights.  While we may disagree over the whole speech thing, we're all allowed the freedom of it - to some degree.  You can be angry that people want to brag about their whiteness or blackness or purple hair and tattoos, but they can be just as angry at you for drinking coffee that day. 

Maybe it's time we all stopped being so damned angry and started trying to resolve.

There are better ways to handle things.  It's a shame that Top Dog didn't take the opportunity to say "we support free speech."  Instead, they catered to politics and a particular demographic as opposed to supporting "for all."  Just like OJ shouldn't be denied parole based on a prior trial with an unpopular outcome, Cole White did not kill anyone and in fact, had participated in the same rallies right there in his own hometown previous to this.  Where was the outrage then? 

Never underestimate that the justice you want to dispense can easily be handed to you as well.  I hate to bring up "the slippery slope," but it is what it is.  Step back from that ledge and think before you find yourself sliding downhill fast. 

The Wonderful Vortex of Oz

I watched my first full length presidential debate tonight.  My first one.  So it only took me 45 years.  My husband remarked that this is one thing that Trump has done for the country; more people are paying attention than ever before. 

Okay, I’ll give him that one.

Though it wasn’t Trump who first got me to start clicking on the political headlines more than the pop culture ones.  It was Barack Obama.  The first time I ever heard of the guy was when he was giving some sort of speech saying that the people of America needed to do a better job of governing ourselves than we have been.  A bit of irony there, given Michelle’s hell bent need to determine the legality of what we can eat these days.  I feel as though we’re divided by parents – he’s the easy going chill dad and she’s the obsessive meddling mom. 

I wasn’t sure what to expect this evening.  I’m not on the side of either candidate, really.  One thing that Obama instilled in me, and I believe in many, is a hope for the nation that the majority will do the right thing.  Right now we’re caught in some pretty faraway places.  It’s like living in the land of Oz, and we’re having to decide between the blustering, deceptive Wizard and the wickedly misunderstood Witch of the South. 

Some things were a given; the delicious sound bites, the trademarked snarling at each other, the color by numbers body language.  At one point I was almost proud of Hillary when she placed her hand over her heart and brought her late father into play.  Classic emo move to play to those who want any reason to feel superior over The Donald.  The one tactic that I recognized immediately was how easily Hillary was able to bait Trump into his usual playground behavior.  Every time he barked, she just laughed.  It’s a style of goading that my brother used to do for the first two thirds of my life until I learned to beat him by simply ignoring him.  Donald Trump couldn’t ignore anything if he ever even wanted to.  The claim that he is so easily provoked by something as insignificant as a tweet isn’t untrue. 

Someone – I can’t recall the name – put it rather succinctly in saying that in tonight’s debate, one needed to prove she had a heart and the other needed to prove he had a brain. 

We’re having to choose between the lesser of two gigantic evils.  On some level, Hillary wants to do the right thing for America, but it’s similar to receiving useless trinkets and polite but meaningless gifts at Christmas.  They’re giving us what they think we should have, not what we actually want.  The exception in politics has been the last 8 years in which many strides have been made in civil liberties and a war that wasn’t his but an inherited responsibility.  If Obama could be elected for another term or three, I just might be persuaded to vote.  Trump, however, is so blatant in his egotistical power trip that people are dazzled into buying their own gifts, and they come with his name stamped right on them. 

I have no prediction to what’s going to happen this November.  My job isn’t to foretell, but to examine what is happening as it unfolds, and it’s been one hell of an eye opener.  I have talked with people on and offline from both camps and asked them many questions.  It’s fascinating to listen to both when I am on the side of neither.  It’s not quite the unobjective view, as if I were to choose between the two it sure as hell would not be Donald Trump.  I am not the 1 in 5 who may have been persuaded to change my opinion after having watched this 90 minute circus. 

What I can say is that I am not surprised by this uprising of the dark lord known as The Donald.  He speaks to people I grew up with, to the ones who are blinded by anger over everything they feel has failed in the United States.  They want a country that will be great again, and ignore the many of whom it was never great to begin with.  Ignorance – whether by IQ or attitude – is the real problem of America.  To quote a Dixie Chick, “it’s been a long time gone and it ain’t comin’ back again.” 

If we were to examine the difference in these campaigns, Trump has consistently brow-beaten any and all opponents and any who disagree with him, and he has fed on the fears of us all by shoveling it back at us with a shiny golden spoon.  Clinton may not be the likable sort and she’s taken her shots.  She had one thing right on the money tonight though:  “I think Donald just criticized me for preparing for this debate.  And yes, I did.  And you know what else I prepared for?  I’ve prepared to be President.”

Game.  Set.  Match.

She ain’t wrong, folks.  She’s been preparing for this moment from the moment she said “I do” to Billy Boy. 

So, America, how’s it going to be?  This land is your land, but this land is our land too.  Are you going to emanate the Cheeto Demigod and look only as far as your front door or your next paycheck, or are you going to take a look around and start helping each other up the ladder? 

Because the only way out of this mess is the way we got into it.  We need to take a look at how we’ve gotten to this place we are in.  It’s quite likely that we’re all so angry because it’s not an answer we want to examine so closely. 

Believe me.

The Wonderful Vortex of Oz

I watched my first full length presidential debate tonight.  My first one.  So it only took me 45 years.  My husband remarked that this is one thing that Trump has done for the country; more people are paying attention than ever before. 

Okay, I’ll give him that one.

Though it wasn’t Trump who first got me to start clicking on the political headlines more than the pop culture ones.  It was Barack Obama.  The first time I ever heard of the guy was when he was giving some sort of speech saying that the people of America needed to do a better job of governing ourselves than we have been.  A bit of irony there, given Michelle’s hell bent need to determine the legality of what we can eat these days.  I feel as though we’re divided by parents – he’s the easy going chill dad and she’s the obsessive meddling mom. 

I wasn’t sure what to expect this evening.  I’m not on the side of either candidate, really.  One thing that Obama instilled in me, and I believe in many, is a hope for the nation that the majority will do the right thing.  Right now we’re caught in some pretty faraway places.  It’s like living in the land of Oz, and we’re having to decide between the blustering, deceptive Wizard and the wickedly misunderstood Witch of the South. 

Some things were a given; the delicious sound bites, the trademarked snarling at each other, the color by numbers body language.  At one point I was almost proud of Hillary when she placed her hand over her heart and brought her late father into play.  Classic emo move to play to those who want any reason to feel superior over The Donald.  The one tactic that I recognized immediately was how easily Hillary was able to bait Trump into his usual playground behavior.  Every time he barked, she just laughed.  It’s a style of goading that my brother used to do for the first two thirds of my life until I learned to beat him by simply ignoring him.  Donald Trump couldn’t ignore anything if he ever even wanted to.  The claim that he is so easily provoked by something as insignificant as a tweet isn’t untrue. 

Someone – I can’t recall the name – put it rather succinctly in saying that in tonight’s debate, one needed to prove she had a heart and the other needed to prove he had a brain. 

We’re having to choose between the lesser of two gigantic evils.  On some level, Hillary wants to do the right thing for America, but it’s similar to receiving useless trinkets and polite but meaningless gifts at Christmas.  They’re giving us what they think we should have, not what we actually want.  The exception in politics has been the last 8 years in which many strides have been made in civil liberties and a war that wasn’t his but an inherited responsibility.  If Obama could be elected for another term or three, I just might be persuaded to vote.  Trump, however, is so blatant in his egotistical power trip that people are dazzled into buying their own gifts, and they come with his name stamped right on them. 

I have no prediction to what’s going to happen this November.  My job isn’t to foretell, but to examine what is happening as it unfolds, and it’s been one hell of an eye opener.  I have talked with people on and offline from both camps and asked them many questions.  It’s fascinating to listen to both when I am on the side of neither.  It’s not quite the unobjective view, as if I were to choose between the two it sure as hell would not be Donald Trump.  I am not the 1 in 5 who may have been persuaded to change my opinion after having watched this 90 minute circus. 

What I can say is that I am not surprised by this uprising of the dark lord known as The Donald.  He speaks to people I grew up with, to the ones who are blinded by anger over everything they feel has failed in the United States.  They want a country that will be great again, and ignore the many of whom it was never great to begin with.  Ignorance – whether by IQ or attitude – is the real problem of America.  To quote a Dixie Chick, “it’s been a long time gone and it ain’t comin’ back again.” 

If we were to examine the difference in these campaigns, Trump has consistently brow-beaten any and all opponents and any who disagree with him, and he has fed on the fears of us all by shoveling it back at us with a shiny golden spoon.  Clinton may not be the likable sort and she’s taken her shots.  She had one thing right on the money tonight though:  “I think Donald just criticized me for preparing for this debate.  And yes, I did.  And you know what else I prepared for?  I’ve prepared to be President.”

Game.  Set.  Match.

She ain’t wrong, folks.  She’s been preparing for this moment from the moment she said “I do” to Billy Boy. 

So, America, how’s it going to be?  This land is your land, but this land is our land too.  Are you going to emanate the Cheeto Demigod and look only as far as your front door or your next paycheck, or are you going to take a look around and start helping each other up the ladder? 

Because the only way out of this mess is the way we got into it.  We need to take a look at how we’ve gotten to this place we are in.  It’s quite likely that we’re all so angry because it’s not an answer we want to examine so closely. 

Believe me.

A Turkey Rebellion

I am so tired of this trend over the last few years to hate on retailers for opening on earlier and earlier on Thanksgiving.  It's annoying, unrealistic, and just another thing to gripe about in America.

I saw a request on Facebook today to please boycott all shopping on the holiday in solidarity of protesting the "corporate greed" that is taking over.  I asked (and never received an answer from the poster), "Where the hell has the love been, the solidarity, for all of the workers who don't get days off based on turkeys, a child in a manger or hopping down a bunny trail?"  Medical, police, fire, restaurants, gas stations, truck drivers, those in the travel industry - these are drops in the bucket of those who make your world turn while you sit at home shaking your fist and hollering about businesses who exploit their workers and want to make a profit - but look at the bigger picture: brick-and-mortar stores are in a frenzy to stay alive and losing the battle.  These Black Friday sales are what carry them throughout the rest of the year.  Then there's that little question on any retail application; "Are you willing to work holidays?  Yes or no?"  Don't check yes and then be pissed when the game changes. 

I worked through many a holiday when I was younger, for various reasons.  Sometimes I wanted to avoid my family, other times I desperately needed the money so picked up the extra shift.  Maybe I wanted too for someone to be at home with their own family.  And sometimes it was because I had no choice. 

Over the years I've learned a few things, and that is how to manage life.  Just because the majority get to sit down to a Thursday feast doesn't mean you can't do it on a Friday.  Me?  I suck it up and suffer through what my family calls a holiday and celebrate for real on Saturday, when I can enjoy the company of my friends who have no family, had to work, or are willing to sit through a second turkey just to be part of my "I am thankful" gathering. 

I don't participate in Black Friday or venture out much over the long November weekend because it's my tradition to pull out the tree, put up the lights and gear up for the chaos of December.

So, while you're with loved ones and having a spirited rant about why Walmart is evil and every retailer should choke on their stuffing, while you're enjoying the parades, the football games and barely staying awake at the end of it all for the evening news, think about all of those ground workers, announcers, athletes, and all of the people behind the scenes who brought you entertainment or needed information who are not at home where you claim they should be. 

Better yet, take an hour out of your holiday to really appreciate those who are working and bring them a box of cookies, a jug of hot cocoa, or anything that puts your "solidarity" where your mouth is.  And be thankful that jobs are there to put a turkey on the table. 

Evil, thy name is John Steigerwald

I have had a lot on my mind lately - death, family, friends.  Ordinarily, I skim through the news and see what's going on in the world as I start my day, much like any of us do.  Little surprises me, much less leaves an icy disdain to wash over me as I try to put my contempt into words.  It's my job, to voice my reactions, my inner workings of the mind. 

Today that is all shot to hell.

I just read an article on the Observer-Reporter, a newspaper based out of Pennsylvania, where this pompous jackwad spewed his opinion as to why Bryan Stow, a fan of the San Francisco Giants, was beaten into a coma for doing nothing more than attending a baseball game.  Bryan was accosted by Dodgers fans after the game, attacked without mercy, and now his horrified family looks on as he lies in a coma fighting for his life. 

Enter Steigerwald, who claims it's Stow's fault he was beaten - he showed up wearing the jersey, after all.  "Maybe someone can ask Stow, if he ever comes out of his coma, why he thought it was a good idea to wear Giants' gear to a Dodgers' home opener..." 

Hey, let's ask that girl over there, after she's done with the intensely invasive rape exam, the harsh realism of her new world, and the exhausting trial why she thought it was a good idea to wear a miniskirt?

My husband is a Green Bay Packers fan.  He's not overzealous about it, but he wears plenty of attire throughout the season to show his support for the team of Cheese.  This past Superbowl, he sat in a restaurant full of people rooting for the Steelers, proudly wearing his GBP shirt, with a GBP mug in hand that he brought from home.  When the Packers won, he, Packer Girl Sarah, and one other guy were the only ones cheering. 

I cannot fathom that he could have lost his life because of it.  My brain can't even process the thought.

All my numbed mind can process at the moment is "WTF?!"  John Steigerwald really, actually voiced his opinion that he felt men who wear jerseys to support their teams simply have daddy issues and need to grow up.  And this newspaper, likely knowing the controversy it would be stirring up - how could they not? - had the audacity to run with it.  I'm not familiar with this publication, but before the day is over, they will know my thoughts. 

I want to encourage you to do the same.  "Due to an overwhelming response, comments have been stopped."  You can, however, contact Steigerwald here:  http://www.justwatchthegame.com  And the newspaper can be contacted here:  http://www.observer-reporter.com/OR/ContactUs/

My instinct is screaming at me to spew right back with my knee-jerk reaction, which is that no ratings, publicity or attention that they will garner as a result of this pig's inhuman thoughts are worth the souls that they sold when they decided to unleash it upon what is left of humanity, but that wouldn't be very mature of me.

I have no idea who Bryan's wife or children are, who his parents are - I actually haven't been following this story very closely, just random thoughts of how awful it all was.  But right now I am thinking of this poor family keeping vigil over this man, and then being slapped across the face by this article so hard it's sure to leave a welt. 

How would you like to stare at the face in mirror who delivered that slap?  Suddenly, "Despicable Me" has a whole new face.